Sweet dreams...

  Last week I was upset that my design didn't get chosen as 

a top 50 finalist for the Lilla Rogers Global Talent Search.  A big 

disappointment but I am going to keep working, maybe even harder now.  

I realize I need to work on self promotion the most.  If no one knows my 

work than it doesn't matter how much I create.  I have worked on my online 

presence but have not sent out enough postcards/letters/submissions.  

This is the stuff I dislike doing the most so it figures. 

  When I started my studio designing childrenswear prints it seemed so much 

easier than trying to get into publishing.  I already knew so many 

people in the NYC fashion industry, plus had many friends in graphic design.
My biggest clients I found through knowing people.
I have gone to SCBWI conferences (three so far) and feel like a little lost
puppy scampering around for a scrap of food, among many, many brothers and sisters.
Try to talk to some of the professionals at conferences and they sometimes have 

this petrified look.  Everyone seems so desperate to get a connection and the 

editors/art directors know it.  Conferences are a great way to get knowledge 

about publishing, but it can also feel a little humiliating. There are so many 

talented people out there.  I think the key is just knowing who you are, and

that what you do and how you create is your own.  When I lose site of that

I get discouraged...I have only to open my sketchbook to remember.  

               I thought of this the other night, almost got out of bed to paint it, for fear of

      forgetting her.  A dog-like-grass-camouflage kinda gal nestles down for a nap among a

       print backdrop.  I don't know what it means, or who she is exactly, but maybe one day. 

Until then it makes me happy just to watch her sleep.  Good night.